No matter what

As i look back on what seemed like a millennium ago, i see that people really do grow and change. Working where i work, you realize how quickly time passes and how fast people grow. Sometimes, the calm kids become the annoying ones. Sometimes the head aches become the leaders of the group... No one can stay in one state forever. There are obstacles in life that make you stronger, weaker, nicer or even pessimistic. But with those obstacles that we have yet to accept, there comes a slight change. A change that chisels away the old you and shapes you into the new you. We are in a CONSTANT changing stage. For example, when you were 4 your favorite color was yellow. When you were 5 your favorite color was green because Hilary Duff's favorite color was green... These phases that we go through, these heartbreaks that we face and these battles that we fight are molding us into the human being we are meant to be. Its not because you're afraid of the color yellow, its not because you dont care for the color yellow... you just took a better interest in green. Just remember that it took the yellow to make the green. Just remember that your past makes you who you are. It will happen that you will hurt people on your way to becoming who youre meant to become... but that hurt will only be helping the other person to shape his or herself into who theyre supposed to be. A domino effect. Dont be mad at people because they are changing, because really you should be thankful because they're changing you as well... "but i dont like change", "but i dont wanna change- thats nice but its inevitable. If its not now, it will be tomorrow.

Yesterday i was a social butterfly. Always wanting to be at every party, thinking I SHOULD be there, i NEED to be there. Yesterday i didnt cry over situations, i kept it bottled in. Yesterday I set an example. I was a good girl, good rep. Yesterday I was single. Yesterday my dream was to play volleyball forever. Yesterday my favorite singer was Britney Spears. Yesterday i felt like my reputation was everything. Yesterday, I didnt know it was yesterday.... Something took place in all of these changes. I made mistakes. I learned, i realized. I focused. I took the time to look at myself, to look at my life and my futur. I cleaned out my closet of all the outfits that brought drama to my life. I discovered a whole other side of me that i absolutly adore. I fell in love...

Today, i dont care what people have to say about me and how im living my life. Today, i pay no mind as to what i have to PROVE. Today, i realize that i can help others by being myself... Today, i know that winning isnt everything, that losing teaches you just as much as succeeding. Today, i take advantage of the fact that i can have everything i want- by working hard. Today, i cry for the sake of relieving my soul. Today, i have a love thats greater than i could ever have imagined... Today, Britney Spears has evolved as well, and with that being said so has my liking to her & her music lol... Today i wake up in the morning, not thinking about what and who i dont have in my life.. but who i do. I think about the fact that everything happens for a reason. That people grow! That people change! That "we are the change that we seek"! There isnt a map or manual telling us who will come into our lives and who will leave. Evolving is natural. So dont be upset that things are changing in your life, because by you changing, you are helping so many other people find themselves as well...

Adieu,
Rae

Still an unbreakable bond

"Young love", is what my mother tells me every time i hang up the phone. "Young love", is what she says when i blush at the thought of him. It is young love, and we all know it is the greatest feeling in the world. Those first months of loving someone, ACTUALLY being in love with someone. Clicking through my memoirs, ive loved. But to be IN love... no. Not like this. Can someone tell me if this is true? Comment on my comments about this relationship and tell me if its real...

*i cherish a kiss on the forehead more than any other kiss he gives me
*i still get butterflies every time we kiss
*i fall in love all over again every time he looks at me
*i feel so comfortable around him i can even shave my armpits...
*i can laugh by myself and know hes smiling
*i'm able to be myself, my true and stupid, over analytical self with him
*i never stop thinking about him
*i zone out just thinking about him and our future
*whenever i watch romantic movies i put us in their shoes and wonder what we would do in that situation
*i never have to wonder if hes cheating, i trust him with everything
*i get this physically painful feeling in my stomach at the thought of him leaving or when we argue


etc...
Could this feeling really be those expiration date, trigger happy hormones my brain is releasing in over dose quantities? or could this really be an everlasting love?

Hibernation over

Well, I'm back. Not that anyone would notice but I feel welcomed for some odd reason. I renovated my page as you can see, blogspot has UPDATED and UPGRADED itself, mazeltov! My last post was... oh my January 21st! What a drought! It is July 25th. My school year was topsy-turvy. I start again in a month.. The end of an era, a huge 5 year era... Who knew it would pass by so quickly? I'm just going to skip right over that scoop of 7 months and head straight for now.

Summer is here. It hasn't been very busy, just heat waves, new UV records, a bundle of clothes from moms new work, NEW MONEY rolling in and crazy kids running around all day making my summer a VERY hectic and tiring one. Summer camp is a great job though, it teaches you a lot of things, patience being the absolute priority. Here's some interesting news, Bonita has reappeared in the picture. Although i am completely and utterly over the whole latino getaway, i cant help but remember what was whenever i look at him. He loves to bring up the past and reminisce, expecting me blurt out those 3 words that mean nothing to him. He likes to play around, sorry! I've got a wonderful beautiful man... hes not worth it. I prefer my all day everyday, all inclusive Jamaican getaway than a latin island i always seem to visit. It lures you in but turns out to be infested with fake attributes that you don't see in the brochure...

The greatest game ever played

Sitting at the table, cards in my hand.
It is not good.
I know this game.
I know it like the back of my hand.
I've been here before, at this same table, in this same seat, playing against the same people.
But i notice one across from me.
A silent player, but an assassin.
Bluffing is his 6th sense. His lies, if they are, are unrecognizable.
A brilliant, majestic, player- going after me.
I think he's feeding off my weakness.
I think he sees i should not be here again... not now.
I hide behind my cards, boy are they awful to look at.
But i keep going. Bluffing, eliminating, taking in the loot- making me a better player.
But the champion is still sitting across the felt table.
Eying me... seeing into my eyes, looking for what my hand is, trying to read it.
He reads it alright, he knows exactly what i have.
I don't even know what i have at this point...
a pocket full of money? a pocket full of fake and pitiful money?
I put on my best poker face. It is nowhere close to his, but he doesnt know that.
Not yet.
The dealer deals the last hand.
I am gambling with fate. I am gambling everything i've worked for...
It seems silly.
Why am i doing this? Why should i risk it all?
Yes, i love the challenge but how is this love benefiting me?
I don't want to be back at zero again.
I don't want to relive the countless times I was trying to convince my opponents i was back, that im completely healed from my past defeat...
He looks at me.
I stare at him, trying to see what he has, what he has to bring to the table.
And there it was.
Only I could have seen this.
Ironically enough that it was me, i spotted the ray of weakness is his beautiful complexion.
He was giving up. He was rightfully, giving me this game.
He puts down his cards, "Straight".
Confident, but sure i had better...
I look at my cards.
I look at what i've had for the first time after staring at his crazy simplicity.
My eyes were open. My heart pounding.
I looked at him.
Forgiveness and passion in his eyes.
I heard his heart beat faster and faster waiting for me to respond.
"Full House"
i lay down my cards.
Suddenly, the win didn't mean a thing to me.
I gambled with my heart again, i risked everything AGAIN and i won.
i won him over.
and it truly is... the greatest win i could have asked for.
His past opponents- i didnt care about.
His past wins- i didn't pay mind...
i was just focused on what i now had, a gold ace of hearts.
I held it in the palm of my hand, filling the little hole that was once so engraved in my hand.
I hold it tightly. Promising never to drop it.
And when it gets too heavy, and this prize over takes me, i will take it out of my hand and move it into MY heart,
so that it will forever remain part of me.

Here's to friday nights of reminiscing!

Along the edge of the world, when things seem to be crumbling off the side- I'll stand by you.
Face flat against the pavement, trying to regain balance on your feet- I'll help you.
Broken hearted, for the distance apart from everything is too much to handle- I'll fix you.
Upset because you think your all isn't good enough for anyone- I'll remind you.
On the verge of giving up everything for the sake of coming home -I'll encourage you.
When the feelings of sadness and jealousy creep into your mind- I'll reassure you.
During times of separation that may lead to unexpected events- I'll trust you.
When the uproars of people start, and try to ruin our love- I'll defend you.
Crossing streets with girls silently screaming for your attention- I'll take hold of you.
Holding your face between my hands and looking into your beautiful eyes -I'll kiss you.
Looking at you making a complete fool of yourself and not caring- I'll accept you.
Silently looking down at the floor because you had a bad day- I'll smile at you.
Not telling me something for the sake of keeping your word- I'll respect you.
Struggling to do or not to do for the sake of injury- I'll take care of you.
As you reach for your dreams until you've attained them- I'll support you.
Doubting yourself, and filling your head with negativity- I'll surround you.
Failing to understand aspects of life and the obstacles being thrown at you- I'll guide you.
Not being able to learn and read the words being said to you- I'll teach you.
Having trouble comprehending the truth in my eyes- I'll tell you.
Losing yourself in the midst of fame and expectations- I'll find you.
Suffering from independence and lack of physical love- I'll rescue you.
Leaving the past and walking into the bright lights of our future- I'll follow you.
Separated by miles or hours that may prevent communication between us- I'll wait for you.
Isolated in an environment that has been and is your dream-I'll think of you.
When the stakes are high and you cannot reach them and think the end is near- I'll believe in you.
And when times arise where you might hate yourself, the world, and the situation surrounding you- I'll love you. For better and for worse. I'll never give up on you.

Because I am You.







Adieu,

Ashley

Bonito

You're mind blowing, and outstandingly beautiful haha.
As time goes on,you get older and more gorgeous every time i see you.
this is wrong, on so many levels. but i never got the chance to write about you.
truthfully, i haven't even had the time to think of you.
but i stumbled on your page today. No mistake...
Ive seen you look like a man, and i notice you still remain "faithful".
Well, thats only what i see.
I hear you got a tattoo, dont know what its of though.
I'd like to see it. I wouldn't mind running into you...
i never got what i wanted from you. and its been... 6 years.
We're old enough i know, but its too late.
I won't lie and say i dont miss you. i do... i'll never forget what we had that summer.
that one summer that changed everything.
Its CRAZY how connections are made when we meet.
But we know better. I know better.

Just wanted to mention that you're beautiful... that is all



Adieu,

Ashley

brainnnn

every time you leave my view, my imagination begins to create itself. it's as if it is replacing your presence. in a way, i hate having you away from me. I feel incomplete; a whole and strong woman, but incomplete. but in another way, i love to miss you. I love to think about what you're doing at that very moment, what you look like and what you're thinking about... I know every inch of you now. I remember and picture every speck on your face and your body. I know your scars, you muscles, your weak spots and your strong ones. I can feel your emotions and sense your need because its as if im part of you and you of me. Its a special bond thats taking place between us and its twisting my mentality around. Its shaping my mind and chiseling my morals. I dont want to make this relationship sound like a fairytale or some super natural story because its not. its an honest and true bond between two simple people.

in my eyes, theres no one at the moment, and in the moments to come, that i rather be with. ive forgotten the rest and am keen on a future with you. Now a future doesnt always mean marriage and kids, im talking the next years to come as our future. If the rest is meant to be, then it will fall into place... i wish it does though. I love having you around all the time. it makes me feel safe and protected. Nothing can ever hurt me anymore because you have possesion of my heart, and you guard it with everything- i see that. I see the passion in your beautiful eyes and the respect in your touch. You listen. you dont just hear what i have to say and you just dont guess my thoughts and feelings... you know them. you listen to everything and realize things i dont even neeed to tell you about.

I know your dreams and you know mine. We know how far each of s will go for them, and promised to not get in the way of that path, only help guide it. I'll stand by you when you reach your goals, and i want you there to stand by me. Stand Tall and Proud.
My brain has been on an instant replay of our memories and times together. Even the simplest of fore-head kisses tears apart my mind because i miss it. I imagine. My imagination has never been so creative. My dreams never so intense and vivid. My art work so profound and thought out and my intensity so willing.

you're always on my mind, and i wonder if you ever get tired and wish to be elsewhere.

Adieu,

Ashley

First Quarrel

I wasnt looking for this-for the trouble in your eyes.
I'm sorry if i killed a couple of butterflies...
I love you and thats all there is to it.
I cant tell you how much, i just cannot do it.
To me, your perfection and an angel at heart
Its killing me softly, the time were apart.
My passion is strong and my head is exploding
The trigger went off before it was loading...
Maybe it was me, maybe it was you
but whoever it was, it fucked up for true.
i hated the words but mostly the feeling.
my heart was pounding but i held back the tearing
It was stupid and foolish, i cant even tell you why
but its been pacing my mind, just walking by.
I dont know what happened, i dont know what to say
but i need to with you at the end of the day...
i feel that its there, the tension of the forenight
and im a survivor from our first but not last fight...

Adieu,

Ashley

Twenty- Ten

Sitting here, on the little cousins couch watching Beatles rockband- just thinking. Thats why im here atm. I dont remember much about last night, or this morning really. All i really remember is "chasing after a giant cat" in the streets of Vaudreuil at 5 AM. We didnt sleep really, and if we did it was well after 7 o'clock in the morning. Felt kind of dizzy this morning, with the daze of the new year. For me, it certainly does feel like a new begining, well continuation. I want to proceed with this year just like the last, only better. I want to take what i learn and it it to use in any and every opportunity. I got a man, a great one. Who i want to be with this this year... as strong as ever. My grades are exceeding, and i plan on maintaining that high. My friends are always there... and I only hope for them to stay. I have a giving and humble family which i am very grateful for. I have a life that is perfect in everyway. A life itself is good enough right?
New Years Resolution: Continue what I'm doing. Continue WHO i'm doing lol. Continue to be positive. Continue to never settle for good, go for the great.

Happy New Year to All!


Adieu,

Ashley

Last entry of the 09'!

With just 4 hours left of 2009 i start to reflect on this past year. I must say im fucking proud. A lot of things happened this year, but mostly strong and independent moments... This year i have not cried for a guy and i dont regret anything. I went to parties that were unforgettable, ive spent time with my girls that build on the memories and i've experienced many relationships. I learned from everyone, taking the advice towards my futur. 2009 was that year for me, it was an amazing year. It taught me how to control things, how to stay focused and how to get over the little things. I altered myself, i changed my mind set and therefore changed myself. With this, i went on to winning a banner. I went on to finish with a 91% average and winning a scholarship and at the moment, am in the midst of an incredible relationship. I loved the year thats past. so many memories, great music/movies... im most proud of my accomplishments and my attitude. I've risen above everything that happened. I brought bitch to the table and although people have turned away or may not like it, its what got me here. strong and independent. and with the new attitude ive adapted, ive landed me a helluva team, a boominggg group of girls, a progressing body and a helllllllllll of a man. So cheers! 20-10 willl be EXCEPTIONNEL BABY!
here are some pics of the year 09!


Adieu,

Ashley

The Language of Love... Attempt 1

Tesoro, dimme que tu sia con me- per sempre. non posso vivere senza tu qui, dal vostro de mi lato. Perche e questo tanto difficile? essendo via di te? mi amor, mio pazzo di te- ti penso sempre. no posso tu dire come tanto ti amo... tu sei la mia stella bello, mi ereo e una parte de mi anima. dovunque que mi vada, tu es per sempre dentro mi pensieri. qualunque cosa mi amor, prometta que tu mai dimenticarmi... tu sia una grande stella, la stella que mi sempre ha saputo tu erano. Ma.. no dimenticarmi amor... ama solo di te, sei tutto que mi bisogno. Mio avere di te, tu amando. tu sei la motivo de mi sorriso e de mio rotture. Capire que ti amo piu di quelle posso dire ... per voi, mi atteza pazientamente, per che qualunque questo tu sei, tu sia sempre ritorno a mi...

Adieu,

Ashley

All Control is Lost

All my life has been planned out for me. School, social life, morals, everything seemed to fit into place how it should be. A prime example of someone who has all her priorities straight and knows everything shes doing would be well, me. I seem to always be in control of what im doing even if it is a bit reckless, i can get away with murder.because i would know how. Quick on my feet ... thats just the way it is for me. but... when it comes to loving you... its very hard for me to control. Because i love you in so many ways imaginable that theyre expanding my heart across my eyes, in a thin layer enough for me not to be blind. I know that sounds far fetched but its true. As i said, i feel older, more mature and much more aware of you AND of what you are doing. So therefore i will not let a mistake i once made happen again. i am not blind in love, i notice everything and i love that. its as if you want me to see, as if youre protecting me while still loving me. youre amazing. I want you so badly, its tempting me to leave everything behind, but then there you are secretly reminding me to open my eyes and stay on my feet. you are the only one who can keep me tied down and in love at the same time. I show you a side of me that ive never ever shown anybody, it means a lot to me that i share it with you, because youre someone i trust in completly.

We mesh so well its sickening. I feel so at ease being with you, being next to you or in your arms. by your side is one of my favorite places to be... i want to stand there and support you. And aslong as im yours, i will forever be proud because youre worth fighting for. I believe no rumour and dont even need to ask you about them, because i believe in something so much more... and thats you. baby im crazy in love with you...

Adieu,
Ashley

Q

Alone.
Where the silence was so loud it pierced my ears. Stuck in a world where i had no direction, no path to follow. I was a lost cause. I felt so childish, so predictable, so foolish. I was a distraught and typical example of someone i despised. i hate it, watching 15 year old girls mourn over a guy, for shits sake youre fucking 15. Thats ridiculous. I'm ridiculous. and i hate that feeling. I'd gained, gained so much that it hurt me until i was nothing anymore. I compared everyone, everything, every place and every moment, but for what? for the journey that in the end i could call, "love"? "Yeah, i loved, once. but its along story"... i didnt want that, i dont want that attention. i hate the type of attention, it makes me feel weak, like i've been beaten and used. I dont stand for that, but in my heart...my heart that had led me to it in the first place was exactly that... manipulated. betrayed. toyed with and shattered. It felt like there was no hope for me anymore, even if i knew that someday it would all wash over, it seemed like i could never be happy again. Never be as joyful, and energetic about love as i was then. I looked at him with awe and passion. There was something i saw that reeled me in, that today, is beyond my capability of comprehension.

Then, 2 years later here you come. here you've always been. someone who in the beggining was a person i would never want to be with. one of many that i stereotyped and filed away in my imaginary cabinet with a NEVER stamp inked across the folder. I guess your file slipped out... You were that guy that i warned girls about. a guy, who is simply being a guy and all he wants is a hole. whenever, wherever... my flag was waving, my red flag was swaying back and forth, so large and in my face that i couldnt see the beauty behind it... And so i peeked. and when i opened my eyes to you, i opened the gate to my heart. the gate that was shutting out everything and every one from my life. I was on lockdown, to even the most exceptional of guys. Guys who i, had broken their hearts because well, its what i was taught to do. But you, you had this ease. this forbidden and midblowing ease about you... and now. i cannot wake up without you in my life. You are one in a million, and i say that with the utmost respect. there is no other word to describe you, but perfect. Your flaw is that you are too indescribable. you are that rare shooting star that comes every so often but only get to see once. you glide across my sky, lighting it up and filling it with hope and faith. You are my protector, the soldier i never had. You say the most beautiful things and lay kisses on mylips like i have never felt before. You are respectful and courteous... you understand my boundries and my limits. you comprehend what im saying with a single glance. you understand what it is to be me. We work so well together baby, and i want this for as long as i may have it. I want to hold onto this relationship with this type of ease for as long as i can, and i will hang on. I do not want to let go of you because you... you are what i've always wanted and its still a shock that you have been here all along.

your passion baby, baby youre amazing. you will succeed in no matter what you chose to do because you are born a star. you were born to soar with those strong and confident wings you have. youre so high baby it makes me want to fly beside you. you bring out the best in me, the best i've ever been. I am so happy with you that this feels like nothing else ive ever felt before. you are showing me a whole new way to love. those kisses... are like soft, warm cashmere blankets upon mine. you know the ones where i cant let go? those are my favorite ones. leaving you everyday is a tragedy but also celebrates the time that must pass in order for me to see you once again. your touch. whether it be your finger lifting my chin, or your hands contouring my torso, your touch lingers... i cannot breathe and i cannot think. i want you near me always. when you whisper in my ear the lyrics to songs; im lovestoned. your words trickle down my back and i feel my knees start to tremble. our rhythm, our pace and the way we are in sync with everything,i love that about us. i love how i can talk to you about absolutly anything even if it means hanging up on you. we have our differences, but they are what makes us so similar.they are what defines us from the rest...

i cant describe what i feel for you... but its a stregth i didnt know i had anymore. Its a feeling of maturity, on both our parts that makes our relationship what it is. I feel so much older and wiser that it reflects on how i treat you and how i want to be treated. you read all my signals and reach beyond my expectations. you are what completes me... and as stupid as this may sound and as naive as i may seem to be, i love you. and after that... there simply isn't anything else to say.

You're boyfriend number two- again.

Hiya Ducky. I missed you, but no worries i knew you would return. And you KNOW how much that bothers me. Guys have radars don't they... Edward came back to Bella just when she started to feel better about his absence. Big came RUNNING for Carrie the same night she was happily leaving for Paris. And you unknowingly, come back into my life when i start to move one... But im not going to lie. I love having you here. I've missed your rude comments but you came with a new attitude this time... a complimenting one. A side i hadn't seen for a long time. if ever.

its not the first time you hear this, maybe not as personal but youre 2nd to me now. i love having you second though, really. and the only place you'll ever move to is first, i guarantee that. but at the moment, i haven't forgotten you. Welcome back to the pond.

hugs and kisses. xo

Adieu,

Ashley

Just fucking around

No homework for once. Results? Dark circles under my eyes and sore muscles.









Adieu,

Ashley

Analogy of a duck.

You know... you piss me off. I decided to NOT fall for you. I came to the conclusion that you're no good for me- that it would never work out. But why is it that whenever we drift away and not even focus on something we know we shouldn't want it ALWAYS just so happens, "coincidentally", to be that one something we cannot live without. Like YOU for example. I knew this guy. I speak to this guy. I fell for this guy. I got over this guy... somewhat. Im trying to convince myself that its not really a good time.. that were both focused on different things but everytime my phone vibrates.. a tiny part of me freezes and wishes its you... your screen name puts me a very quiet state. your status updates make my eyeballs rolls. and you comments... in my inbox when it says you wrote on my wall, "Like"d something or commented a picture- GOOD OR BAD, i smile. I can't help but watch you msn name go from green to gray, from busy to online. That little ducky thats been your default picture since the first day i met you annoys the living shit out of me. But if you would change it, i would feel compelled to ask therefore be afraid to get a " lol" or a simply "ok". That rubber ducky means something to me. It means you haven't changed, it means to me that youre still the same guy i always knew. and if you changed that picture... i dont know maybe im over-reacting. but i would feel as if you've moved on. Not that i dont want you to or stopping you, but perhaps the moving on will lead you to forgetting me. i cant help but wonder if i mean anything at all to you, if you mean the things you said. if i leave; would it bother you? or would you simply just give me the regular "ok"? But one things for sure, if the rubber ducky decides to switch baths, my water would not be very relaxing anymore.

adieu..
Ashley

School Approaching :(

NOOOOOOOO my relax time is slipping through my fingers... not cool. One week to go, 5 days to be precise. Then no more sleeping in. Its just going to be books, book, books, an orange ball, a stripped wilson and laced up touch-down for the next 10 months... WWOOOHOOO. atleast ill get a tight body (hopefully ) *yn
Adieu,

Ashley

Forbidden Love

I was really starting to fall for you- even though i knew i shouldn't have.You were someone I completely and willing got to know despite the red flags. I began this relationship; this friendship we now have, but i do not want to be the one to end it. You were good company... for the time being. Everyday you managed to put a smile on my face even if it was not funny. A compliment, and insult... Either one would suffice because i was talking to you. You; an older, wiser more experienced, determined boy. I admired (and still do) your passion for that orange ball. It was what attracted me to you from the beginning- and the more you spoke about it the more i was intrigued. i love a guy able to commit, who is fit, strong, intelligent and takes charge. You were everything and more. you are the perfect match! You play hard to get which is an alteration in my game... a challenge. I also like challenge. There are risks and certain rules i know i have to break to get to know you and see you. and sometimes i think it might be worth it- but when you pull those lines... those stupid, childish, MEN lines i just want to forget about even making that first move...


Adieu mon amour,

Ashley

Quicky!

Heyyy there :) Summer is finally here in Montreal. Highs of 32 degrees! Woah! Scoarching... Sorry for the blog's appearance its under construction. Today i went to LaRonde with camp. it was Hot and sticky and i dont feel well so it was kind of a nightmare for me.. anyhow. my day gets worse. I'm entenred into this scolarship program, PBSSQ(philipino benevolent and scholarship societyof Quebec) and so ive been working on an ESSAY. thats right. and ESSAY during the summer! i ALSO have to complete a biography of my honours and achievements and a reasearch project on the Philippines. On sunday when i do my interview, i also have to write a short essay... Doenst this suck? Yes it might, but the prize IS 500$ and Top Scholar of the Year. Good looks on a CV doesnt it? I'm working towards my money * lol juuustttttt NOT kidding. anywho I MUST get back to work. Just stopped by to blog. Even though NO ONE reads this anyways!

Adieu,
Ashley

I have a dream

I had a dream about you last night.
We were lying in the sand watching the sunset.
I heard nothing but waves washing against the shore.
I saw nothing but your tanned face looking at mine.
Love was in the air.
The beach was clear. Couples had started back to their hotels and we were alone.
I loved it this way. It was like we heard each others thoughts better.
I was you, and you were me.
We were one.
I looked at you so happy... Finally.
Our moment was interrupted by funny giggles "Mommy! Daddy!"
We laughed and grabbed our children in our arms.
Finally we had gotten to that dream of ours. The one we had the day we locked eyes.
You hadn't aged a day...
You were beautiful, a God.
We were healthy, fit and amazing parents.
She was gorgeous, our daughter, she had your smile.
He was handsome, our son, he had your strong posture.
We had a family together.. nothing seemed wrong.
Its funny how in dreams you don't remember exactly how that person treated you in the past.
All you know is that you are happy in the moment that in reality, lasted a mili-second.
It felt so real. It felt as if you loved me...
But then again... I was only dreaming.


Adieu,

Ashley